Charlie Stryker

Memorial Notes

June 17, 2006

Let’s begin with a home-made parable. The lesson was the Twenty third Psalm. The teacher copied it by hand with a ball point pen. At the very end of the Psalm, a small glob of ink settled onto the page where the period was supposed to be. The ink smeared. The teacher copied her hand-copied Psalm and gave it to the class. One girl quickly shouted, “There is a smear on the page. Look, there is a smear on the page.” The teacher tried to teach, “The Lord is my shepherd” but all the girl could see was the smear and she missed the beauty of the Psalm. Here ends the parable.

How will you remember Charles Stryker?

Personal Characteristics

Charlie Stryker was not a tall man but rumor has it that he could always be found in a crowd – one simply had to listen for his laugh.

That laugh – strong, bold, loud, full of energy and life, and sometimes just a little too much, one simply had to listen for that hearty laugh.

Charlie was a man who loved to stay connected.

More than once, usually after 4 in the afternoon, I received a call from Charlie, something that needed a little conversation.

Where was he? On the Kansas Turnpike, traveling, I’ve been led to believe, at a very brisk rate of speed – He liked to talk and he liked to go very fast.

He loved machinery, loved to drive it and frequently did it harm. The family’s observation was that he loved it but wasn’t very good at driving it.

Do you know how much he loved to fly? Until his heart attack a few years ago, flying was one of his great pleasures and being unable to fly, for medical reasons, was one of his great disappointments.

Did you ever encounter his intensity?

We were in a meeting talking about the construction of our Christian Community Life Center when Charlie looked at the architect and said, “I’m sorry but there is a better way.” It was more than an observation. It was a test of will. It was intense. That moment and what followed saved this church about $1 million.  I believed him when his brother Ron said that Charlie could stand toe to toe with anybody – mentally.

He was a man with a remarkable capacity for vision.

Always he was looking and frequently he found a better way.

He often saw what was coming before anybody else.

And more than most, he aligned himself with his vision and he aligned those who were with him with a vision of what could be.

He was a builder. He was nearly driven to build, to make, to create and construct, to do something new, to make things better.

In talking with the family, some remembered that for a time, they would hear Charlie humming a Sammy Davis tune that captures that sense of “the builder.”

Listen as Becky sings the tune that played in Charlie’s head.

“I’m going to build a mountain.”

Professional Life:

Many here were professional colleagues.

You know his incredible talent for things pertaining to engineering.

The distinctive culture of his business

His distinction of being a member of the Kansas State University Engineering Hall of Fame

The local designation of “Engineer of the Year”

The variety of professional societies that were enriched by his active participation

I have been told that one of his employees said that Charlie taught him that it is possible to be both ethical and successful in the business world.

Honesty, Integrity, Responsibility, were as important to Charlie as were Competition and Productivity and Profitability.

I remember personal conversations in which he described the sense of responsibility that he felt towards his employees, the sense that each family’s livelihood depended on the effectiveness of his company.

He also mentioned an organizational experiment or two that did not work and the distinct impression that he was always looking for a new or better way to do the business at hand.

Family

If you know Charlie, you know that business was only one of the drivers in his life.

Beginning with his Dad and Mother and Grandparents, his life was profoundly centered in family.

It was with his Mother and Father that he learned both the core values that guided his life and some of the practical skills that allowed him to succeed.

To know Charlie was to know how much he loved his Mom and Dad.

And there were his brothers who together created an adventurous band of amigos. Ron and Russ were life-long partners in the journey of life. 

Do you know that Charlie and Ron experimented with an above the ground transportation system?  High in the family barn, they created a rope and pulley system to transport a tub from one side of the barn to the other. And then to test the new transit system, they paid younger brother Russ the handsome price of one piece of grape bubble gum to take the high ride, in the tub, across the barn while they operated the machinery from their safe positions on the ground.

Later he and Karen grew their own family.

As I have known him and listened to those who know him best, I think it is impossible to overstate his love for Karen and the children.

I asked Karen how they met and she said that Charlie used to say that “He bought her.”

Charlie worked for a firm that bought or merged with the firm for which Karen worked. She came with the deal.

And with Karen came Amy and Travis, an instant family, and Charlie loved them as his own and they became his own.

Charlie knew that fatherhood was far more than a matter of biology, it is a matter of love and guidance and provision and mentoring and being there.

Then Elizabeth arrived and Charlie loved her with all of his energy. I was standing nearby when the family went with Elizabeth to the casket last night and I think that I saw him smile as she drew near.

Maybe it was my imagination but I know that he took enormous delight in her and that he loved her.

And, of course, Elizabeth led him to TARC, where he contributed significantly.

Finally Justin. As Justin grew and learned to operate the machinery, as he steered it into the lake and other places, Charlie smiled broadly and said, “That’s my boy!”

Hobbies

When I asked about his hobbies, I learned that he often engaged a hobby in order to involve his family.

Fly fishing, which he didn’t to

Motorcycles

The homes away from Topeka

Golf

Charlie was always finding some way to play, some new task to master, some new gadgets to buy and use, and most of them involved his family.

Church and Faith

To celebrate Charlie’s life, we must lift up one more matter.

Charlie loved this church and he yearned to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.

I do not say that he yearned because he was less successful than the rest of us but because, at least in recent years, he intentionally engaged the work of the church and the work of Christ with a deep desire to learn and to know.

He once called to say, “Tell me about the tithe. Do we tithe on the gross or on the net?” And I gave him the least satisfying answer that an engineer can receive. “Charlie, the book is not entirely clear. Say your prayers and do what you think is right?” That is not nearly definitive enough for an engineer!

I know that he was generous with the cause of Christ. 

I know that the ministries and activities that happen in our Christian Community Life Center happen in large measure because of the intense and committed contribution that Charlie made in talent, time and treasure.

I know that he pushed us to be more effective organizationally and to be more focused in our mission, more centered on our purpose.

And I know that he was more than supportive of his pastors.

I asked the family, “Tell me about his faith.”  And they said, “It was strong.” He read his Bible and he prayed and he tried to live with integrity.

Final thoughts

Here in Kansas, we have a very large sky. There are days, not very many, when the clouds roll in thick and black and it looks as if the dark clouds will forever hide the sun. It appears as if darkness will squelch the light.

And then, through a crack in the clouds, you’ll see beams of light breaking through. It is almost as if, instead of a shower of rain, we are being blessed with a shower of light, beams of light breaking through the clouds, proclaiming that the sun still shines on the other side of the darkness.

In these dark days, as we mourn his loss and celebrate his life, I am confident that little beams of light are breaking through the darkness.

A couple of months ago, we remembered Good Friday and we celebrated Easter. On Good Friday, when Jesus hung on that cross, it appeared to all of the world that the forces of darkness had squelched the light. But then came the dawn of Easter morning and the light shown and Christ was resurrected.   I believe in Easter. I believe in Resurrection.

I have not forgotten the smudge at the end of the page. But I also know the Gospel of Jesus Christ. The apostle Paul once proclaimed that “God showed his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Heaven is not reserved for smudgless lives. Heaven is for the broken and the hurting and all who seek the grace of God as revealed in Jesus Christ. And I believe that God is now healing that which was broken and restoring that which was lost and Charlie is safe in the arms of God.

I am more concerned for the rest of us. Our healing must happen here, in this world, amidst the never ending imperfection of life in this world. But that healing can and will happen. No doubt there will be scars on the soul but God will heal.

That is what God as Holy Spirit does for those who live in him. God’s overwhelming mission on this earth is to empower each boy and girl, every man and woman to be whole in their relationships with God and one another.

The sky is dark. The clouds are thick. It feels like Good Friday. But the Easter light has already shown on the dark places of this earth. We’ve all been warmed by it. And it will shine again. We will all be made whole.

In the meantime we celebrate the beauty of Charlie Stryker’s life and give thanks to God for him.

Amen

Joe Kutter

Pastor